a simple request

Dear Clever Programmer,
I am duly impressed by your unparalleled mastery of [complicated subject matter].
I am also humbled by your selfless contribution to the community, in the form of your freely available Useful Package For Using [Complicated Subject Matter] in [programming language].
Furthermore, I am so glad you took the opportunity to demonstrate your mastery, too, of [programming language], as clearly demonstrated by:

  1. The stunning brevity and cleverness of the demo code, which masterfully exploits several obscure and undocumented / unexpected features of [programming language], ensuring that only  someone on par with your mastery can even understand how the demo code works
  2. The requirement for several other Packages for Using [Unrelated But Equally Complicated Subject Matter], thus ensuring that I must attempt to process, debug, and decipher several utterly unapproachable subjects simultaneously just to get the demo to work
  3. A near total lack of actual documentation, besides the occasional snide / snarky comment like "OBVIOUSLY, this must be NIST SHA-1 digest format in binhex! ;)"
  4. Your nearly religious, fanatic ability to troll EVERY online forum, answering any question even remotely related to [complicated subject matter] with the offhand and utterly condescending "If you just used my Useful Package for Using [Complicated Subject Matter], this is SO EASY LOL!"
Yes, thanks to you I get to enjoy attempting to totally reconfigure my web server, install a series of impenetrable configuration files, and compile various packages from your forked source code in the hopes of simply getting the demo to work, so that I can then take advantage of your superior, time-saving package so that I can simply and easily utilize [complicated subjet matter] in the best way possible for [programming language].

1 comment:

Myron said...

Sounds like a personal problem!